Entry 8619- All my friends are lonely / Pt. 1

Notes from the inside This inner world; We show each other these as best as we can, Trying not to miss anything important If I’m not paying attention, You may slip. I can’t catch you If I don’t know Where you’ve gone, inside. We rescue ourselves and This is understood, But the fact that I…

A Reminder: You’re a Human Thing

:: HUMAN :: Hello, Human! Hello. You are flesh and sinew and blood and bone! You are morning glory cells and serotonin and all that is ephemeral and all that is tangible in sweat and love. You are everything in life and beyond death and back around. Oh, Human! You do what you can. And…

The Beauty of Street Art 

I live in a city covered in street art. Ever since I started taking thousands of pictures on my long walks through different neighborhoods, I’ve come to recognize the various forms of public art that exist here: the crap people write on walls whilst drunk, the privately commissioned murals decking the sides of lofty brick…

Entry 71815- Home Made

Waking up, it was quiet in the small home I made, of small and precious items. Bright petals ripen to life in the sunlight and every unanimated thing rests for use, mine. This is new, still. Home used to be full of choices that weren’t my own. The sweet- Where I grew up, it smelled…

On the “Useless” Emotion of Guilt

On the third night of a weekend retreat on Buddhist grounds, somewhere in the state of New York, I asked a question of my teachers: what is the antidote for guilt in Buddhism? A soft-spoken nun named Chen-Ma laughed a bit and spoke into her mike after a measured pause: “In Buddhism, we consider guilt…

Entry 61615 – Halved

________________________________ Halved am I, unreachable between worlds. Pulling from one will break me.  _________________________________

Climbing Trees, Smelling Flowers: A Rainy Nature Walk

I kneeled to the glory of mushrooms growing up from cracks in the pavement. How tough must they be to choose this place to live.  I looked deep into layers of rough, rain-stained bark, wondering at the strength of this skin. I climbed a tree! It was soaked and full of baby bugs. I recognized the hunger after…

Weathering a Storm of the Heart

Heartache is a creature discomfort unlike any other known to us humans. Unlike the usual sadness or despair we experience over things like a lost job, lack of parental support, or not having as many social opportunities as we’d like, matters of lost or damaged loves are particularly and broadly wrenching and tend to send…

Crashing: Thoughts on a Bus

On the bus, I looked out the dirty window and wondered how many people out there wanted to survive themselves like they want to survive the world. As I stared out the window wondering, a truck knocked into the bus three blocks from my stop. The truck driver got out and yelled at the bus…

New York in the Time of Blossoms

There’s a dramatic shift that takes place between the end of winter and the full flourishing of spring time. Earth beneath concrete that was for a long series of weeks colder than cold, and blossoms that went barely noted as tiny green buds see fallen petals under the thick, dripping shadows of fat, colorful flowers….